[T]hough we prize strength above all else when facing hardship, there is no time when self-care is more important. During a difficult breakup or divorce, we are going to be made vulnerable, even if it happens on our own terms and we win any contentions. It can break your spirit, no matter how well you fare on paper. So, you need to know to stop that from happening.
Breaking Your Spirit: Putting the Past Where it Belongs
Forgiveness is crucial. You might think that’s only true for other situations, one where the wrongdoing and rightful scorn falls so one-sidedly on your ex-partner. However, it’s even more important in situations where you have been wronged, since that’s the only time that forgiveness really matters. Even if a fight gets legally messy, keep your emotions clear about it, seeing it only as an objective and not a vendetta, can stop you from getting spiteful. In the end, that spite only makes the wound all the deeper on not just your partner but yourself.
Keeping Things Clean
You can’t always prevent a breakup from getting messy, especially if it’s a marriage breaking up. However, where that is an option, you should be the one to take the high road and push for it. Equitable Mediation shows examples of steps you can take towards an amicable divorce. Your ex-partner might not always see fit to follow your example but, hopefully, they will see that it’s an option much less likely to lead to both financial and emotional devastation on both ends.
Breaking Your Spirit: Find Your Support
Asking for help is not a sign of weakness, especially when you’re thrust into a scenario of true distress. Thanks to sites like Thrivetalk, help is easier to find and more convenient than ever. Not only should you aim to share your burden in a safe environment. Getting an extra pair of eyes on your situation can help you find a little bit of perspective and stop the bad habits that we all have get in the way of what is the most practically healthy option at the time.
Start a New Chapter
Self-care isn’t just mental and emotional. It’s about every aspect of your life. There are a lot of mental health benefits of eating right and exercising. Instead of feeling like you’re doing nothing but losing, you should set healthy goals for your life and fulfill them so you get the reinforcement that, yes, you can make your life better after this.
Breaking Your Spirit: Avoid the Social Circle Circus
If you share friends with your ex-partner, then “dividing” them is one of the most harmful parts of the process. Your relationships can be damaged irrevocably, and your friends become an audience to the breakup more than anything. Use apps like Meetup to start building your own independent social circles instead, so you have a little social normalcy.
You can’t prevent a breakup from taking an emotional toll on you. You can, however, make sure that you bounce back stronger than ever as well as developing and maturing thanks to the ordeal. But that doesn’t automatically happen on its own, you have to work at it.
Contributed post. Feature image via Berdnik Oleksander via StockVault.