[S]o many times we focus or hear about terrible divorces and custody battles that last forever. In my 18 years of dealing and working with child custody issues, I have run across a few shining examples of parents with the greatest divorces. These parents worked it out, put their kids first, and got along better than most married couples.
The Greatest Divorces: I’ll Watch, You Date
When my custody case first started, my attorney James Newth, told me the story of a divorce he had just completed where the parties got along fabulously. He was never clearly sure why the got divorced in the first place. They had worked out all the details of separating their assets, figured out co-parenting visitation and the sharing of all their 8 year-old daughter’s expenses.
But the defining moment of how well they got along, came down to an evening when the Ex called the Dad and asked him if he would watch their daughter while she went out on a “first date.” The dad, himself having already made evening plans with his serious significate other, told his Ex, “You know what, first dates are important. Let us cancel our evening plans tonight, I’ll watch our daughter for you, so that you guys can go out and have a good time.”
The Greatest Divorces: Let’s Sit Together in Church
My second story comes from a couple who was leading and teaching a divorce recovery class at my church. This remarried couple got along with his Ex extremely well. How well? The families sat together in church and would frequent one another’s home for Sunday dinner. They attended their kids sporting events as a group and frequent coffee together to talk about the kids. The remarried adults maintained an unbelievable friendship and the kids lived at both homes fairly harmonious during their teenage years.
Now I am not for a second advocating that some day you are going to get along with your Ex to these levels. I am not even suggesting you are going to maintain any resemblance of friendships. But I share these true stories to show extreme examples of how parents who put their kids first can get along amiably with their Exs. What can you do to help your children live harmonious? What can you do to ease the tension that exists between you and your Ex.
[tweet “Sometimes post divorce tolerance is not possible, but there are a few who do take the high road.”]
And for their kids, it has made all the difference.
Feature paid image from Adobe Stock photos.