If there’s one thing we all want to do, as parents, it’s getting better at it. While there are hundreds of parenting blogs out there telling us how to best achieve our parenting goals in reality affecting real change can be difficult. This is made all the harder if our family has been fractured either through death or divorce. While we may not always get it right, there are some fundamental, practical changes we can all make to become better parents and role models for our children.
Here we take a look at two basic but important skills we can put in place to help give our children an added sense of security within the parent/child relationship and work on perfecting parenting:
Perfecting Parenting – Listen More, Talk Less
Have you found yourself saying the same thing again and again and yet your child never seems to listen to you? Well, that’s because they’re probably not. This is the case for two reasons. Firstly, are you a nagger? Do you pick up on everything they do and never let anything go? Now’s the time to make that happen.
You really only need to focus on elements that are absolutes in your household and in control. Such as physical violence against a sibling, and perhaps shut off the computer when it’s time to go to bed. That coat that got left on the chair? Really nothing to start nagging about.
The second reason you might not get the attention you expect is about modeling good behavior. When Johnny tells you for the umpteenth time about a new level they reached on his computer game, or problem at school are you really listening or are you simply going through the motions and making the right noises? We need to ask ourselves why our children should listen to anything we say if we don’t extend the same rules to them.
Perfecting Parenting – Take Risks Together
We’re not talking dangerous risks but something new and exciting that breaks everyone out of their routine. It’s great for children to see you learning as you go, stepping out of your comfort zone and achieving something new. Think of activity like rock climbing, which can be done indoors, or taking up another sport that neither of you has experienced, fun and exciting times together are fantastic bonding experiences.
With these two tactics up your sleeve, even if you’ve gone through the stresses and strains of a divorce or a death, listening and carrying out a new, slightly scary shared activity can bring a real sense of togetherness back into your family.
That divorce attorney may have helped free you from an unhappy marriage but now, more than ever, your children need to know it’s not the end of family times. Instead, it’s a new beginning with two happier parents who, while not together, excel at being Mom and Dad in their own rights with their children’s interests at heart.
Contributed post. Feature image via Pexels.