I am in a series discussing the The Disneyland Parent Syndrome Defined. We talked previously on The Guilty Disneyland Parent, who tries to over compensate for the guilt they feel when missing their kids by over doing the gifts, trips, and bending the parenting rules. To the Manipulative Disneyland Parent that works their controlling agenda on their kids, to finally focusing on the deepest level when the non-custodial parent pushes their hurt revengeful feeling into their kids.
Bill, a Special Forces sniper returned from his final tour of duty overseas only to find an empty house and divorce paperwork. He tried everything to gain his wife back from her new found love–Paul. He hired an attorney and fought hard for better access to his boys, but in the end had nothing more than every other weekend access. The entire process made him very bitter, jealous of Paul in his Ex’s life, and hollow about the limited time he now has with his kids.
The Making of a Vindictive Disneyland Parent
The weekends started out as party time with the kids, church and homework were forgotten and replaced with endless ice cream, no bedtime movie nights, and regular trips to the toy store… The Guilty Disneyland Parent kicked in. But bitterness turned to hate, and hate turned to revenge when he learned of Paul’s proposal to his Ex.
Bill started bad mouthing both his Ex and Paul in front of the boys. Encouraging them to become spies reporting anything and everything they didn’t like about mom’s house back to him. Explaining to his boys that they would betray his love for him, if they were nice to their new step-father, Paul. Bill making up silly hurtful songs about his Ex, encouraging the boys to cry at exchanges, and told them it was their mother’s fault they didn’t see him more. Telling them stories that if they lived with him all would be better in the world. He even goes as far as encouraging them to act out at mom’s house. Bill has clearly stepped into the “Vindictive Disneyland Parent.”
How have you seen the Vindictive Disneyland Parent play out? How have you been hurt by the Vindictive Disneyland Parent?