The Denial Period
For anyone who undergoes a dramatic life change of this sort, you can almost always expect there to be a period of denial. Some people might be more affected by this than others, and it could be that you do not really experience it very much at all. But it will affect you to some degree, even if it is just a subtle underlying feeling. As long as you prepared yourself for it, you will be more likely to act in a positive way, so it’s worth bearing it in mind if you want to put yourself in the best possible position for the future. Denial can take many forms, and sometimes it’s just a matter of taking a long time until you appreciate what is really happening. Don’t be afraid to be patient with yourself as you work through this initial difficult period, as it is something which can take time and which is going to be difficult for most people in your situation.
Aspects to Divorce – Get Help
No matter who you are, or how well you generally deal with things, divorce is something that affects everyone hugely. It is best to consider this as early as you can so that you can try to find the right help early on, otherwise you might find yourself being a little stuck. Again, it’s worth reminding yourself that there is nothing wrong with asking for help, and it’s also a good idea to bear in mind that help can come in many forms. Sometimes it’s simply spending time with an old friend who can guide you through the emotions of the process. Sometimes its legal help you require, which might be more about finding the right divorce attorney for yourself. Whatever it is, be sure to get the help you need when you need it. There is no reason not to give yourself the best possible chance of getting through the situation by enlisting the help of those who might be able to assist you.
The Emotional Life
This is unarguably going to be one of the most emotional times in your life, and that is worth remembering if you want to make the most of it. You might surprise yourself with how many different emotions you experience, and in fact, it can be something of a roller coaster for even the most stable of people. Again, the important thing is that you are preparing yourself for the changes that you are likely to undergo, so that you can be much more likely to deal with them well and in the appropriate manner. Whatever emotions you do experience, remember that it is entirely natural. There is no such thing as a wrong feeling, so there is no use in making yourself feel ashamed and even worse just because you feel worried about your own emotions. The emotional side of things is going to be the biggest thing you have to deal with, so don’t worry if it takes you a time to get used to it and get it right.
Aspects to Divorce – Who Are Your Friends?
One of the most worrying things for most divorcees is that suddenly you find you also don’t have all the friends you used to have. The old cliche about one of the two people getting all the friends does seem to often be true a lot of the time. If you find yourself as the one without many friends after the divorce, you might be struck with a deep feeling of sadness about how unfair life can be. You might feel you have lost everything in your life which was once good, and it could mean that you need to make a profound change in the way you think about things. If this is the case, you might want to do something to try and be social again. This in many ways is one of the best things you can get out of a divorce, and it’s worth considering if you want to make the most of a poor situation.
The Social Life
This is actually something else which needs considering on its own merits. Although your divorce might be the saddest time of your life, it is likely that you will also be able to use it for good by making more of your social life instead. Use this as an opportunity to see more people and get out a little more, and you will find that this really helps you to get past the less favorable aspects of the divorce situation. If you are finding it hard, or you feel out of practice, you might want to think about taking a little time to try and start slow and gradually work your way up. As long as you are looking ahead and doing whatever you can to become more social, you will find that it makes it much easier to carry on. This alone is something that will help you to make more of your life, and it’s worth remembering so that you don’t overlook it.
It is possible to go through a divorce and still look after yourself in such a way that you come out basically unscathed. Remember that, and be sure to remain as positive as you can throughout this difficult process.
Contributed post. Feature image via Pexels.
Latest posts by FullCustodyDad / Fred Campos (see all)
- Handling It With “Dad Gloves” – Protecting Your Children (Without Going Overboard!) - October 10, 2018
- Co-Parenting In Peace After A Separation - September 28, 2018
- The Hard Path From Cool Dude To Cool Dad - September 27, 2018