Too many divorcing parents go into child custody cases ill-prepared for the emotional trauma ahead. They will read and hear about it, and try to brace themselves, but nothing can truly prepare them for it. So too often, they try to slog through it, and hope they can carry the load alone.
Such is rarely the case.
Child Custody & Divorce Stress is Tough
Child custody puts you over your head in almost every facet of your life, and will negatively affect you in innumerable ways. You can’t do this alone. In the same way you need help with the legal obstacles, you need help emotionally.
The first step is to find a friend, or at least a friend of a friend, who has personally experienced a child custody case and divorce stress. Whether the outcome worked to their advantage isn’t important. Through meeting with them you will learn from their mistakes and avoid some of the heartache and pain they experienced. And you will have found another valuable ally for your team.
But finding this ‘friend’ might not be so easy.
If your ‘friend’ is a person who harbors lingering bitterness toward the other parent, or parent’s attorney, you might want to look elsewhere. This is about your emotional well-being, not theirs.
With Divorce Stress, Find a Friend Who is Not Bitter
A bitter person could increase your trepidation, and even torpedo your efforts at gaining custody by planting potentially unnecessary and destructive negative seeds. They will only increase your angst and create more sleepless nights for you, as you wonder not only if you will ever get out of the situation, but if you will turn out as bitter as your new friend.
Maybe even more important, you should select a confidant far removed from their trial’s outcome. Often, short-term frustrations and anger moderates with time. Your personal long-range goals are easier to achieve if you see someone who has won that battle.
That may be the greatest help of all, as divorce doesn’t come with warning labels. If it did, I am sure it would say… “For your safety, Caution: Friend Lift Required.”
How has a friend helped you through a divorce?
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